Monthly Archives: November 2016

Quack! Quack! Doctor LookOut

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New in Town and Looking For a New Doctor

Abby M. moved to Florida from the Other Coast and searched high and low for a new Internist. She said she scoured the Blue Shield /Blue Cross Directories and knew she didn’t want a Russian or a South American physician.

Feeling like Goldilocks  She did her due diligence: one Dr was too far away, one was too old, one was too strange. Then she found Dr Bill. He scored well on ‘Health Grades’.

There is no Yelp for Doctors in Florida. Why?

She found the medical building in a strip mall and walked into the office. There were posters taped to the walls. The tape was peeling. There was a display case with odd and ends of vitamins. The receptionist had very, very, long  purple nails. Her braided hair was a shade of red-orange-ish. Her skin was brown and leathery. She didn’t look healthy. She gave Abby forms to fill out. The forms had been xeroxed so many times the print was blurry and virtually impossible to read.

Abby indicated she had filled out the forms online.

And, then she waited. For 45 minutes. She said she almost walked out several times. Posters? Purple nails?

Finally, she was shown to the intake room. Dr Bill was a cordial man of about 35. He listened attentively, did a cursory check of eyes, ears, tongue, heart/lungs and listened to her short list of ailments.  He said he would have to do blood tests to establish a baseline.

The Doctor warned Abby– a Very Large Medical bill would come from the insurance company. He told her not to panic. The bill would go away. He repeated the message.

<Caution!>

A girl led Abby to a room down the hall. Evidently, it was the Blood Test Room.  It doubled as the room for storing urine samples- which lined the shelves. There were Dozens of open urine samples.

Numerous and various blood draws happened. As Abby left, she was told her results would be ready in 30 days.

In the meantime, a huge bill – $4,000.00- came from the insurance company.

Abby went to the follow up appt and told Dr Bill a very heavy elephant was sitting in her chest in the form of a hefty bill. He laughed and said “it will go away.”

The Doctor then reviewed a 14 page document with her – her blood test results. 

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Rosetta Stone Required?

The Dr scanned the 14 pages – circled some items- highlighted a few.

On the last page he wrote: Drink more water, eat less sugar, eat more salmon – wild and take 4000 iu Vitamin D.

Ta da! That was it.

Fourteen pages of test results. (The  $4000.00 bill evaporated.) to get exactly what health tips Oprah had suggested in her magazine the month before. And, the month before…

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Taking Action? Who are you going to call? 

Action is the highest perfection and drawing forth of the utmost power, vigor, and activity of man’s nature.

Robert South

 

Vigor

Ms Eagle ruled the class with a wink and a nod

Everyone wanted to get into Ms Eagle’s class.

She had been teaching at the school for 11 years and parents went out of their way to ensure their kids would be enrolled her class – not the alternative fifth grade class. Secretive donations to the school  were made, gifts were given, events were catered by parents dying to get their kids and to Miss Eagle’s class.

Miss Eagle was famous for students showing up, participating, doing their homework and scoring exceptionally well on tests. It was said, she never raised her voice. A child was never sent to detention, nor were there any notes going home to parents regarding the poor behavior of her students.

When Tommy W was in second grade, he began to hear from his older siblings about Miss Eagle’s class. He knew he had to get in that class. The story goes, Tommy had seen his brother write messages on post-it notes. In third grade, Tommy wrote “mythical” on a posted note and put it near his bed.

He also wrote the word on his speech development class book.

One day his speech teacher asked him why it written the word on his book in red ink.

And in his  lisp he said, “I want to be in the mythical class.” At fiirst the teacher was confused and quickly understood Tommy wanted Miss Eagle.

(And not the mean teacher Ms WayBack)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mythical

One small pin speaks volumes

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Will you choose one small pin?

Put a safety pin on your coat, jacket, blouse T-shirt…

to quietly say

I support solidarity & intollerance for hate,

 I stand for your right to be who you are

You are Safe.

 

Tiny

If you don’t like…

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Flames

President Lincoln said it best

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“We are not enemies, but friends.

We must not be enemies.

Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection.

The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched,

as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.”

Abraham Lincoln

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Uncle Charlie- married again. And again.

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There was something about our quirky, kooky, Uncle Charlie that attracted women.

He was short and balding; he didn’t play one sport; abhorred board games, and would not play cards, dominoes, chess or checkers. He was not good with kids, and women were mad for him.

As kids, we were impressed by the parade of pretty woman he brought to family events. At Thanksgiving, there might be a tall redhead in a tight dress and high heels who towered over him. We all stared.

One Christmas, he brought a petite, blonde woman dressed in all in red – with a velvet miniskirt and black boots. We couldn’t stop staring at her either; she smoked cigarettes and blew circles of smoke. She used a huge gold compact and applied red lipstick in front of everybody. We were entranced. She was the most beautiful woman we’d ever seen. Later, we heard, Uncle Charlie married her. We never saw her again. We guessed he “unmarried” her.

One time, Uncle Charlie came over to our house with two women, one on each arm, and they were laughing and carrying on. They were quite loud and asked for martinis- like it was trick or treat or something and our mother left the room. Dad had to coax her to come back to the living room; she was not in a good mood. I think Uncle Charlie picked up on this and escorted the glamorous women back to his Cadillac. I remember he returned to the house to apologize to my mother. She was having nothing of it. He didn’t come over for a long time after that.

The Easter I turned 13, Uncle Charlie brought the most beautiful blonde woman to our house. She was dressed totally in pink. Her   dress was like a dream; it was floaty and chiffony and had spaghetti straps. Her shoes were hot pink and matched her purse. Uncle Charlie announced that they had just been married in Las Vegas. My little sister and I thought that was the most romantic story ever.   He introduced her as ‘Aunt Crystal.’ And she quickly told us she spelled her name with a “K.” I wanted to be a Krystal- and wear pink. Uncle Charlie told us they were going on a honeymoon to Europe and Aunt Krystal said she would send us kids post cards. We could hardly wait. There weren’t any postcards, and we never saw Aunt Krystal again.

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At my Sweet 16 Party, Uncle Charlie showed up, unannounced. We hadn’t seen him in years. He drove up in a  classic Jaguar X KE and Betsy – who looked like the Farrah Fawcett poster- on his arm. She looked very young for Uncle Charlie. My mother made up some excuse about fake place we had to go to and my uncle and his girlfriend left. I heard my mother say, “That woman was all over him like a cheap suit!” It took me years to figure that one out.

The next time we heard from Uncle Charlie he was getting married in Monte Carlo and he would send us pictures. We are still waiting.

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Cousin It

SF Mansion sold to 30 yr old for $21.8

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The most expensive house on the market in San Francisco finally sold.

The Price? $21.8

The commission to the real estate agent?

You do the math.

The new owner is Kyle Vogt. And, aren’t his parents proud?  

Vogt is a serial entrepreneur who sold his car automation startup, Cruise Automation, to General Motors for a reported $1 billion in March; he remains its very young wealthy CEO.

Vogt is also a cofounder of the video streaming startup Twitch, which Amazon purchased for $970 million in 2014.

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Kudos to this very smart 30 yr old man.

    And now, about that Mansion:                    

 Bedroom Information: Seven

  • 4+ Bedrooms on Upper Level
  • 1 Bedroom on Lower Leve
  • Bathroom Information
    • # of Baths: 
    • 3 Baths on Upper Level
    • 5 Bath/Powder Room on Main Level
    • 5 Baths on Lower Leve
  • Living Room Information
    • Living Room on Main Level
    • Family Room Information
    • Family Room on Main Level
    • With A Breathtaking 180 degree Vie
  • Dining Room Information
  • Dining Room on Main Level
  • Formal- Very Formal
  • Additional Rooms
  • Den/Bonus Room:
  • Office,
  • Recreation Room,
  • Laundry Room,
  • Full Basement,
  • Wine Cellar

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Great View of the Golden Gate Bridge.

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