Dr Slice and Dice – Florida’s finest

pink high rise building
Breasts, Buttz, and Nose

My new dentist’s office was located in a towering pink and white skyscraper. White sky scrapers are everywhere. In South Florida- buildings with pink stripes are not unusual. On Dixie Highway, people in the know call the building “Knose, Bressts and Butts.   The Pink Palace is the go-to address  for a plethora of plastic surgeons…who makeup up the majority of tenants.

My appointment with a dental hygienist was slated for 7:30 AM with directions to arrive early for paperwork.

As I pulled into the vast garage- where even the walls were painted pink and white- I saw a parade of sleek, black, limos lined up …out the length of the building.

 There I saw, one by one, women swathed in bandages and headscarves gently assisted into the limos and whisked away.

As a parked my yellow VW bug, I was intrigued by the car choreography.

I walked cautiously towards the entrance and the limo line. A man dressed in a black turtleneck and black slacks, with the clipboard gave me a nod, a small smile, and rolled his eyes.

I walked up and said “ Hey, what’s going on?”

 He said, in the South in the mouth drawl,  “ These are the ladies of Doctor Slice and Dice. … all the pretty ladies. I call them all “Barbie.” With new butts, boobs, smaller noses and tummy tucks. Darlin, they are all on their way to the Barbie Hilton for RnR – Rest and recovery.

 FACT:These women can’t look in a mirror for one week because there’s bruised as a mango. In week number two, all bandages are off and it was worth it.

buff woman
Having Work Done

A woman wearing hot pink, velvet, Juicy running suit was wheeled out. She had oversized Armani glasses over her bandaged eyes, a red Birkin bag, and a diamond the size of an egg was on her right hand. Her limo was a Bentley.

Welcome to Florida.

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