Category Archives: Dating

She just wanted a few diamonds

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Candy was a party girl. She lost interst in school – she got a job as a waitress -then became a cocktail waitress and was having the time of her life. Tips were flowing and there were parties all the time.

She met men ( both single and married) every day of the week and created a network of fellow “Fun Devils.” She claims she was never bored.

And then, the boredom hit the fan. Never in 1 million years did Candy ever think she would be bored with serving drinks and smiles. One of the old guys- a regular- once said if she ever needed a real job to contact him. Bingo.

In one week’s time Candy went from serving drinks- to a receptionist job in small law firm. it took a while to learn the names of the partners, and to become acclimated to the many machines she was using a daily basis.  She rose to the occasion – everyone in the office appreciated her bubbly personality and her diligence.

After several months, she was both liked and respected by everyone. Unbeknownst to the people in the office, she and Bradley J.  were dating very quietly, very surreptitiously. She knew he was “the one.” She also knew that she wasn’t getting any younger and was hankering for a diamond ring on her left hand.  She had dated enough to know Bradley J was a keeper.

And so it began, Candy created a very clever campaign to win the Bradley J. over and get that diamond ring of her dreams. She started with subtle comments about 14 carats.

Soup Kitchen Lines

After two months of no response-Candy decided she had to be more clever.

One day she sent her secret beau text message saying she was Craving 14 carrots.  (Spellcheck wasn’t working.)

That afternoon, Bradley J, put a brown paper bag on her desk. She was thrilled. She open the bag only to find the large, economy-size bag of pre-sliced carrots.

Frustrated-a little angry-she decided the panacea to this dilemma was to be more forthright.  That evening as they were walking towards her apartment, she steered him to the window of the famous jewelry store.

Staring at the tiny galaxy  of shiny diamond rings, she said, “Guess what I want?”

He said, patting the bag,  I know “Minestrone, Chianti and fresh French bread with melted butter. I’ve got it all right here.” 

Bradley J. was super book-smart and very slow when it came to Life 101. It took Candy  another two months to get him up to speed. Voila!

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Panacea

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To tell the truth online? Maybe

15369922_1393636857336651_9025385505994077622_o-3Catherine has a high profile job in a fancy San Francisco law firm. Her private office with a view, on the sky high floor of the Embarcadero, was the result of countless wee- hours spent “chained to her desk.” She had been known, like her colleagues, to pop in to the Ladies – pull off yesterday’s blouse and pull on a fresh, starched, blouse, re-apply make up, put her hair in a bun (ponytails don’t cut it on the 35th floor) and return to her desk. Another day …


At her college reunion – she noted lots of the girls were sporting diamonds on their left hands – many were engaged or married. Three of her old friends were preggers. She had been out of touch – lamenting  the “nose to the gridndstone” life she was living.

Casey, one of the mean girls, stood next the Catherine at the wine bar and blunty asked her why she wasn’t married. Taken aback,  Catherine bragged she was on the Partner Fast Track at the law firm and didn’t have time. Casey sneered and said, “You can’t sleep with a Tort or a decision. Try online dating. I did – look!” And she waved a multi karat dazzler in front of Catherine’s face.

The wheels began to turn and churn. Should Catherine do the “Tinder isn the Night” thing? Could she use a fake ID?

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Stay tuned…

 

via Daily Prompt: Identity

My Life, Time: Look!


My Life and Time…magazines that define us

A creative writing teacher once asked the class to summarize our life-time with magazine names… I grew up in a classic 1950’s small town in northern California. It was very Sunset magazine.

  • The 1960’s were Beach Boys, Beatles, Rolling Stones and it was very Seventeen magazine.

  • The 1970’s meant college in  California, the  Temptations, the  Four Tops, Santa Cruz, Peace marches in Golden Gate Park, living in Mexico; and it was a Time magazine, National Geographic meets Mad magazine with Travel and Leisure, thrown in for color.

  • The 1980’s meant multiple careers and reading material went from Modern BrideWine SpectatorFamily Circle, and Parenting to Juggling 101.

  • The last decade has been that whirlwind of the Sandwich Generation- on wry- caring for aging parents and teens. Coming to many forks in the road and taking them…  Coming through divorce-land with a very bright light at the end of the tunnel.

It’s been a decade of How-to-Books: How to find the perfect assisted living; the perfect high school & colleges, the best family-law attorney and finding new paths to happiness and fulfillment. New Chapters – living and writing a whole new life time.

So far so good!

It’s been very Charles Dickens: best of times worst of times…and

I’m Still Here

Good times and bum times, I’ve seen ’em all And, my dear, I’m still here Flush velvet sometimes Sometimes just pretzels and beer, but I’m here I’ve run the gamut, A to Z Three cheers and dammit, C’est la vie I got through all of last year, and I’m here Lord knows, at least I was there, and I’m here Look who’s here, I’m still here

As performed by Elaine Stritch

 

Toto! We are not in Kansas anymore…

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Hello! Hollywood!

Not a lot of Bookstores in South Florry…

The Conciege at the glamorous hotel laughed when I aked him where a bookstore was located downtown.

After the big laugh, he reminded me South Florry was famous for reading

50 Shades of Gray.

That “tome”  was the “most read” book in Florida.

Really? 

Larry the Librarian

A library is not a luxury but one of the necessities of life.

Henry Ward Beecher

At first, he was Mr Right – then not so much

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Julie fell madly in love with John before she even met him.

Her best friend, Cathryn, had been ‘selling’ him to Julie for three months before he even moved to California.

“You are going to love him!” was Julie’s mantra. Next, she would launch into how much John and  Julie had in common. The list was uncanny. They were both Yankees fans, Aires, Skiiers, quasi vegetarian, hiking-biking Mother Nature lovers who loved to cook.

For two years, Julie had dated a passel of people on Match.com and was both depressed by dating and at her wits end. This John guy sounded good.

Flash Forward six months: John arrives, moves in a mile away and they meet. Their first date is four hours and has Hot Romance written all over it. Their second date is twice as long – twice as much fun -and Julie is falling hard and fast.  John is tall, dark, handsome, flirty and romantic.

Then, he had to travel to India for two weeks – return home “sicker than a dog,” and they don’t see one another for a month.

He made no effort to call or text – she followed his lead. Confused.  She was beginning to wonder and have second thoughts.

It Happened in the Meat Department

Saturday morning, Julie was strolling the aisles of Whole Foods when she saw John across the crowded Produce Dept. Her heart leapt, she was excited. She quickly pushed her cart towards the mountain of citrus before she saw that John was shopping with someone. A woman. A Lulu Lemon clad, bleached blonde with ginormous cleavage.

She nonchalantly backed up her cart and slipped over to the Meat Department to pick up the lamb chops. Within a few seconds, John and Lulu walked right behind her. She was invisible. And she was crushed.  She left her cart in the aisle and quickly walked out of the store.

What truly depressed her was images of the many clowns on Match.com with whom she was going to have to engage. Her skin prickled. Her head was spinning.

Little did she know she was about to meet the real love of her life…japanese-cherry-trees-724289__180“Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time.

We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.

We are the change that we seek.”

Barack Obama

 

 

 

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She thought she said ‘gray’

birthday-cards-owl-quote-2Lori was an avid bicyclist. She belonged to two long-distance clubs and they travelled. There were five other single women in the group. Yes, they were competitive and a bit aggressive – however the women had a bond. They were all – nonchalantly- on the look out for: Rodney Right- Mr Big – The One.

Most of the men in the group were married, engaged or rabid riders who only kept track of their time.

One Saturday, the group pulled over in a huge park and stopped to have a bite to eat  (Quest Bars and Water.) Lori noticed a friend from work across the park and peddled over.

Her pal, Suzanne was with a large group of men and Lori  was intrigued.  She spent 30 minutes chatting with Suzanne and rapidly meeting a passel of people. Then, her group was off and she caught  up with them. 

Janelle, the loud girl in the group yelled back to Lori that they guys looked pretty “Gray” code for: old and not available. Lori kept quiet. There were a two men who were very friendly and handsome.

The next day, Lori called her new-best-friend Suzanne, to chat and really to ask about the very cute, older, guy in he turquoise blue riding ensemble. Mr Salt and Pepper Hair had been very attentive to Lori. Suzanne was out riding her bike when she answered Lori’s call.

Above a cacophony of street noises they chatted. Before Suzanne hung up – Lori asked about the cute older guy. And she heard he was “Gray.” Click.

No problema. She liked older men.

It took several phone calls, a little Google research,  and time before our friend Lori realized Mr McDreamy  was Gay not Gray.

Next!

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via Daily Prompt: Gray

 

 

Thou shalt not Flirt?

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The Annual He-She Man Hating Club – Non Flirting Branch – were quite pleased with themselves.

The six card-carrying members had attracted four young women who might, perhaps join.  Club members served tea and finger sandwiches while they espoused their views on men, mating, dating and flirting.

The singular most important rule pertained to Not Flirting in Public. The Club members proudly performed their Club song:

 Rooty toot toot, Rooty toot toot! We are the girls from the Institute!

We don’t flirt – we don’t kiss- we don’t hug – we do things like no one does.

Rooty toot toot, Rooty toot toot! We are the girls from the Institute!

We hold hands, walk by your side and smile all the a while.

Behind closed doors, we do what we want, with whom,

and take the secrets to the  tomb. Rah!

Membership had been down – the members were dying to attract new women. Many had called – out of curiosity-  and none had joined.

In time, the Non-Flirting Club evaporated and no one spoke of it again.

The only lingering evidence was the picture.

Pleased