Category Archives: Relationships

Somber, Sober Sane: read this

Please Read this by Yale Epidemiologist, Jonathan Smith:

As an infectious disease epidemiologist, at this point I feel morally obligated to provide some information on what we are seeing from a transmission dynamic perspective and how they apply to the social distancing measures. Like any good scientist I have noticed two things that are either not being articulated or not present in the “literature” of social media. I have also relied on my much smarter infectious disease epidemiologist friends for peer review of this post; any edits are from that peer review.

Specifically, I want to make two aspects of these measures very clear and unambiguous.

First, we are in the beginning of this epidemic’s trajectory. That means even with these distancing measures we will see cases and deaths continue to rise globally, nationally, and in our own communities in the coming weeks. This may lead some people to think that the social distancing measures are not working. They are. They may feel futile. They aren’t. You will feel discouraged. You should. This is normal in chaos. But this is normal epidemic trajectory. Stay calm. This enemy that we are facing is very good at what it does; we are not failing. We need everyone to hold the line as the epidemic inevitably gets worse.

This is not my opinion; this is the unforgiving math of epidemics for which I and my colleagues have dedicated our lives to understanding with great nuance, and this disease is no exception. 

I want to help the community brace for this impact. Stay strong and with solidarity knowing with absolute certainty that what you are doing is saving lives, even as people begin getting sick and dying. You may feel like giving in. Don’t.

 

All in the Family?!?

Please don’t hug me…

Although social distancing measures have been (at least temporarily) well-received, there is an obvious-but-overlooked phenomenon when considering groups (i.e. families) in transmission dynamics. 

While social distancing decreases contact with members of society, it typically increases your contacts with Family Members AND very close friends. 

This small and obvious fact has surprisingly Profound Implications on Disease Transmission dynamics. 

Study after study demonstrates that even if there is only a little bit of connection between groups 

(i.e. social dinners, playdates/playgrounds, etc.), 

the epidemic isn’t much different than 

if there was no measure in place. 

The same underlying fundamentals of disease transmission apply, 

AND the result is that the community is left with all of the social and economic disruption but very little public health benefit.

You should perceive your entire family to function as a single individual unit; 

if one person puts themselves at risk, everyone in the unit is at risk.

 

Seemingly small social chains get large and complex with alarming geometric speed:

If your son visits his girlfriend, and you later sneak over for coffee with a neighbor, your neighbor is now connected to the infected office worker that your son’s girlfriend’s mother shook hands with.    This sounds silly, it’s not. This is not a joke or a hypothetical. We as epidemiologists see it borne out in the data time and time again and no one listens. Conversely, any break in that chain breaks disease transmission along that whole chain.

In contrast to hand-washing and other personal measures, social distancing measures are not about individuals, they are about societies working in unison. These measures also take a long time to see the results. It is hard (even for me) to conceptualize how on a population level, ‘one quick little get together’ can undermine the entire framework of a public health intervention, but it does. I promise you it does.            I promise. I promise. I promise.

You can’t cheat it. People are already itching to cheat on the social distancing precautions just a “little”- a playdate, a haircut, or picking up a needless item at the store, etc. From a transmission dynamics standpoint, this very quickly recreates a highly connected social network that undermines all of the work the community has done so far.

Until we get a viable vaccine this unprecedented outbreak Will Not be Overcome in one grand, sweeping gesture, rather only by the collection of individual choices our community makes in the coming months. This virus is unforgiving to choices outside the rules.

My goal in writing this is to prevent communities from getting ‘sucker-punched’ by what the epidemiological community knows will happen in the coming weeks.

It will be easy to be drawn to the idea that what we are doing isn’t working and become paralyzed by fear, or to just‘cheat’ a little bit in the coming weeks.

By knowing what to expect, and knowing the importance of maintaining these measures, my hope is to encourage continued community spirit, strategizing, and action to persevere in this time of uncertainty.

Jonathan is a lecturer in Epidemiology of Microbial Diseases and Global Health at Yale University School of Public Health.

 

Shelter in place and Wash your Hands

Handwashing is one of the best ways to protect yourself and your family from getting sick.

Learn when and how you should wash your hands to stay healthy.

~~~~~Wash Your Hands Often to Stay Healthy~~~~

Tell a Friend…nicely.man-couple-people-woman

 

You can help yourself and your loved ones stay healthy by washing your hands often, especially during these key times when you are likely to get and spread germs:

  • Before, during, and after preparing food

  • Before eating food

  • Before and after caring for someone at home who is sick with vomiting or diarrhea

  • Before and after treating a cut or wound

  • After using the toilet

  • After changing diapers or cleaning up a child who has used the toilet

  • After blowing your nose, coughing, or sneezing

  • After touching an animal, animal feed, or animal waste

  • After handling pet food or pet treats

  • After touching garbage

PLEASE      Keep SIX FEET AWAY

Dating 101:Rock star, rocket scientist or regular guy?

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Come fly with me! What are you looking for?

Hello, Beginner Daters, Here is a hot tip: slow down, babycakes.

Yes, you are excited. Dating again! Visions of romance and candlelight and holding hands and…are dancing in your head.

 

Perhaps your sky high expectations are all Dusty Springfield: 
Thinkin’ and a-prayin’ Wishin’ and hopin’ this is “the one.”

 

Remember, the first few dates are not a job interview. Meeting for the first time is supposed to be fun, interesting, and a potential opportunity to click with a kindred spirit. Play nice. No guessing games. No games, period.
Take your time: Just because you both signed up for the same dating site doesn’t mean – at first blush – you have to divulge your income, IQ, blood type, age, weight, or divorce settlement.  Seriously.
Maybe your absolute best, wildest dream date is a movie star… or a millionaire…a rock star…

Psst: Chances are – they are already taken.

Best Dating Advice for Beginners? Slow down, relax and enjoy the ride.

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Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.

Henry Van Dyke

 

 

Mad Libs

Phrase never uttered in FL:Cute as a bug

black and white insect on green leaf

The perpetually Sunshine State may be all about miles of white sandy beaches, warm aquamarine waters, and stately palm trees but, it also is the

Bug Capital of the Region.

“La Cucaracha” was a song we sang in 8th grade Spanish class. Here, they are your roommates.

Our backyard is a vast tropical expanse.  There are a dozen palm trees of varying sizes and a massive Star Fruit tree that drops bitter yellow blobs at an alarming rate.

Forget about sitting quietly and meditating while gazing upon this lush, green paradise.  Everywhere you look, slithering on every tree, table, chair fencepost -are lizards, geckos and chameleons and the occasional black snake.   They say the snakes are benign and supposedly good luck,  however, that rising up like a Cobra-thing they do before they dart and gobble up lizards is gross.

Early on, the perpetual optimist, I thought I might take up gardening, and tame our backyard.  Naïvely, I gently lifted a dangling vine, only to uncover a huge, shiny, 3-inch, brightly colored red and green bug.  All aspirations for gardening ended then and there…

To the mall and beyond!

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Cucaracha‎

Why I left Myammy…

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The Old Best of Myammy List?

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Welcome to Myammy

South Florida – home to a plethora of restaurants – surely decorated by Baz Luhrmann, in a fit of Not-so-great-Gatsby.
“Florida Decor can be very theme-park and over-the-top or subtle and suitable. Take your pick.
One does have to adjust to the fact:  ‘Everything is located in a strip mall’ – including,  the cleaners, the upscale restaurant, the hardware store…
Welcome to South Florida

My Best of Myammy

Best Dine-Outside– Argentinian – Intracoastal-View – Superlative Service- Restaurant – Kaluz 

Best H’Wood BakeryChocolada ‎- skip the restaurant –go to the divine Pastry display- oh la la!

Best Movie Theater– FTL the Classic Gateway No glitz – just charm; big selling point:no previews.

Best H’Wood French – Le Comptoir – famed for Mussels and Pomme Frittes, Steak

Best Over-the-Top-Big Décor Very Good Italian – Brio Tuscan Grille– Bisc. Blvd at Gulf Stream Race Track

Best Seafood Lunch Two-fer on the Intracoastal- Blue Moon Seafood Co  FTL

Best Post Office Superior Service – Hallandale Post Office on Bisc. Blvd.  Service so good- it is surreal.

Best Oil Change-Sam’s Garage–a well-respected institution for decades -1021 NE 44th Ct, Oakland Pk

Best Pancake RestaurantThe Original Pancake House – 2125 Bisc. Blvd, Aventura

Best Dentist – Dr Maureen O’Flannagan -Deerfield Beach – 2nd Generation DDS /UOP Grad

Best Sunday Brunch Restaurant –The Sea Watch – Lauderdale by the Sea – Beware the lines- enjoy the Sunday scene- ocean view- plams swaying, waves crashing

Best Library: Alvin Sherman Library on NOVA Campus -FTL (Bonus: Peter Max and Dale Chihuly Exhibits)

A tropical resort at sunrise.

 

Best Downtown Miami Restaurant City Hall- ‎ Gold Stars: superior food, and service

Best Hardware Store– Ace Hardware 5 Star -If they don’t have ityou don’t need it17811 Bisc. Blvd.

Best Chinese – Silver Pond  – 4285 Florida 7, Lauderdale Lakes, FL 33319

Best Ladies- Lunch with a View – FTL – Hilton Hotel- S3 – steak, seafood oceanfront

Best Dollar Store – Clean, Pristine, Sea Ranch Shopping Center – Lauderdale by the Sea

Best Target – Hollywood Park Branch –  a best kept secret – no lines, impeccable

Best Miami MuseumThe Perez- Allocate an hour to view the Ai Wei Wei exhibit. Fabulous.

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Are you with me? Tell me about it…myammy101@gmail.com

 

Overheard at the Miami doctor’s office

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There were two women sitting across from one another, at a famed Miami Plastic Surgery suite of offices.

Both were thumbing through glossy magazines and chatting while glancing up at the long list of   “Miami’s Dr. Marvelous’ Menu of Augmentations and Services” dancing on the huge, sleek, black, wide screen TV across from them.

Le Menu:

Breast Augmentation – Breast Lift | Breast Reconstruction – Breast Reduction – Brazilian Butt Lift-  Liposuction | Male Breast Reduction – Nipple Procedures – Tummy Tuck – Mommy Makeover  – Ear Surgery –  Eyelid Surgery – Facelift – Facial Implants | Forehead/Brow Lift | Fat Grafting | Necklift | Nose Surgery | Hand Rejuvenation | Injectable Facial Fillers | Laser Skin Resurfacing ….

blue and silver stetoscope

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Woman #1 Says: There are two things you never ask for in this office.

Woman #2 Says: Really? Tell me – this is my first time.

Woman #1 (without missing a beat) Says: “Never ask for a ‘Kim Novak’ or a ‘Liza Minnelli’

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Women helping Women

one day at a time…

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http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/03/05/prompt-sleep

Wow: Our neighbors are legendary, Latin, and loud

Palm tree and sky

Welcome the South Florida – AKA  there goes the neighborhood.

Legendary:

Neighborhood rumors are that the great-grandfather fashioned a raft made of mannequin body parts, used the mannequin arms as paddles, and in the dead of night, the family escaped Cuba and arrived on the beaches of Florida.

The legend goes, the waters were treacherous, and usual dancing dolphins not did shepherd them – but a phalanx of alligators escorted them – day and night -to freedom.  A bounty of ripe coconuts bobbing by provided food and drink. Tiny, tasty fish jumped from the sea onto the raft for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Despite those ‘miracles’ they report their harrowing story makes Hemingway’s Old Man and the Sea look like a canoe ride in Central Park.

Welcome the Neighborhood

The Loud Family – not the PBS special

On the Fourth of July our traditions involve red, white, and blue Bunting, strawberries, blueberries, and sparklers.

Theirs involve guns, Sky Flyers, Roman Candles and Screeching Rockets.  And, more guns.  Why does anybody shoot at the sky?

Our Christmas celebration involves a tree, colored lights and tinsel and Bing Crosby crooning Mele Kalikimaka…

Their Christmas celebration involves a month long production of decorating every square inch of the exterior house with colored lights, so bright that you can read a book at midnight by the light of their decorations.  Neighbors have taken to buying  blackout curtains to use in December.

For some reason, the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ inspires more loud Salsa music, guns and shooting at the sky.  (Hey! Santa Claus is up there!) The symbolism is lost on me.

Our Easter involves colored eggs and lots of chocolate.  Their Easter celebration involves 10 cars and several motorcycles parked on their front lawn; barbecuing a baby goat; loud Salsa music for two days; gales of laughter; clouds of cigar smoke and more guns. Again, with the shooting at the sky.

The legendary, loud family – is very friendly and extremely gracious, and, at one time, they invited all the neighbors to their various celebrations. The guns were a buzzkill.

Home Sweet Home?

In South Florida, you see many homes with two chairs on the front porch. When the weather is cooler, people sit on the porch – perhaps, sipping iced tea? Our friendly neighbors have six chairs, a keg, a boom-box and a tiny disco ball.

There goes the neighborhood…

We heard today that the neighborhood has gotten too quiet for the family and they are moving to South Beach. Evidently, Great-grandpa owns a few condo buildings in Miami and he will move the families. Go figure.

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The Legend of the Loud Family

Grandpa had a small department store in Cuba and each evening he would bring home a mannequin part to his tiny garage. He fashioned a raft using bits and pieces of the store mannequins.

The day of the great escape, each of his sons playfully carried one quarter of the raft to the beach. Each of the daughters nonchalantly carried mannequin arms to the getaway point on the beach. The story goes, the 10 family members boarded the body raft, used the arms as paddled and they landed in the Florida Keys.

They caught a wave, the phalanx of alligators escorted into the shore and they walked to Miami.  Grandpa arrived with a quarter clenched in his teeth.

You can’t make this stuff up.

Oh wait, yes you can.

A man’s friendships – speak volumes

“A man’s friendships are one of the best measures of his worth.”

Charles Darwin

Buckle up, it is going to be a rocky break up

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Blinded by love?
Valerie  gathered her four best friends for a Martini Party to talk about the status of her one-year relationship with Dennis.
 They hadn’t seen her in weeks and wondered what the heck was going on. She had been hook, line and sinker in love with this cowboy- and they wondered how long it would last.
Pygmalion Playboy
With his encouragement (read: to make him happy) she lost weight, changed her classic Nordstrom’s wardrobe to more risqué attire- involving boots, shorter skirts and tops that were very Va Va Voom.
She changed her hair color- he liked brunettes. He also liked a mane of massive curls- she got a permanent. She thought she looked like Little Orphan Annie- he said she looked, “hot”
She even shocked herself when she took a Pole Dancing class in the City. She gave up her tickets to the opera and the symphony and found herself actually attending NASCAR events.

 

Her Ivy League credentials and her impressive resume-landed her a job as the VP of Finance for a small start up – in no time, it was taking off like a bat out of hell. Initially, she worked long hours- as the company steadied it’s course – she found herself slipping out earlier each week.

Her co-workers watched her morph from a conservative, tailored, corporate image to a faux Burning Man devotee.

Dennis had introduced her to “dive bars” and they had half-dozen sites they rotated in and out of. That afternoon, Valerie arrived early at The Crazy Pelican  and saw a woman sitting on Dennis’ lap.
An empty beer pitcher and a package of Marlboro’s were on the table.
She stopped dead in her tracks.
He saw her and slurred, “Come on over, baby. I want to introduce you to Tiffany.”
C’est Fini, baby!

All it took was that one sick scenario for Valerie to wake up and realize she had been bamboozled by love. It was as though the gods had thrown a lightning bolt at her. Bam!

She walked out and never looked back.

He called twice. He texted her five times. And she never heard from him again.

She promptly donated her “Dennis wardrobe” to Goodwill and pulled on her own life again.

 

“You have power over your mind – not outside events.

Realize this, and you will find strength.”

Marcus Aurelius

 

 

 

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