Category Archives: Welcome to Florida

Cannabis Candy? Hoax or panacea?

The women in the book club had been friends for decades.

There was hardly a secret between them.  Until Joanie and her  perpetual insomnia battle ended abruptly.

One meeting, she arrived bounding with energy and brimming with enthusiasm. She announced she had finally found a pancaea for her sleep deprivation.  Most of the gals assumed she was back on Ambien. 

Joanie had all the girls sit down with wine glasses filled. She shared her most recent foray into research for a Good Night’s Sleep. She cut to the chase and admitted she discovered that an old friend had a medical marijuana license and had “turned her onto” some fabulous cannabis chocolate edibles to induce sleep. You could hear a pin drop.

The ladies in the book club perked up. The more Joanie bragged about sleeping through the night, the more fascinated  the women were with this new product. Many of them suffered from insomnia, too.

Joanie told them about Green Health Consultants and an RN, Eloise Thiesen, with  whom she had booked an appointment with for the next week.

They agreed to meet the next week, and rather than discussing books, they would be discussing yummy edibles, and medical cannabis. And, so it begins

 

Yes, you can Call Eloise Theisen, RN who counsels patients on how to use cannabinoids safely and effectively to treat illnesses and reduce the intake of pharmaceuticals.

She provides patients with phone, office and in-home counseling, and individualized treatment plans developed in collaboration with dietitians and patients’ doctors.

 

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Berry Bites…

Edible

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The top 8 best tips – finding a new dentist in Florida

Top 8 tips for selecting a new dentist: beware the red flags

New in town and looking for a dentist? We all know the 1-800 ads on TV are a flim-flam-scam, right?

Caveat Emptor. Statistically, 1000 people move to the perpetual Sunshine State of Florida every day.  Chances are they will be looking for a new complement of doctors – including a new dentist.

If you’re like me, you’ve had the same set of doctors for a couple of decades- tried and true, honest and then, bam! Here you are – starting anew.  How hard could it be to find a new DDS, right? It is a Herculean task. Get your head examined before this dental exam

 

Sunshine State

Pay close attention to these eight red flags when looking for new dentist in South Florida:

1.) Check out the dentist’s website – Is it full of flashing lights, long lists of potential procedures- lightening, brightening, Botox, Chemical Peels, braces? Does it look like a flashy boutique or a dental office? Is there a neon sign stating: Se habla español, French Canadian, and Urdu?

2.) If the office sends you a six-page questionnaire – pause.  Some South Florida dentist’s charge a whopping $90 consultation fee to review that questionnaire.  Fifteen minutes: $90? Go figure.

3.) Ka-ching! If the doctor owns his own building, is a solo practitioner, and has a private parking lot, wide-screen Tv’s in every room – I’ll let you guess who’s paying for that.

4.) There is no free…If you’re offered coffee or tea upon arrival in the office- guess who’s paying for that?

5.) Coming up roses? If after the procedure, you’re offered a long-stem pink rose… ask yourself that same nagging question.

6.) If after the procedure that Dr. says, “0h, by the way, now that I’m done, you might need a root canal on that tooth. How about a little bit of Botox? Pause. See those red flags?

7.) Hidden Fees? If you think that $90 Consultation fee before the procedure is a little- shall we say, redundant and inappropriate – and you ask for it to be waived in light of the costly procedure and they say, “No.” Pay attention to that.

8.) Hit me again? If the nurse tells you that your next appointment will cost an additional $130, just to inspect your mouth – big Red flag.

An older, wiser, dentist commented that these extraneous charges and multiple bells and whistles are because

that DDS is new and paying off his extraordinarily high tuition fees – or he has a new, second – or third wife.

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Beware of the sharks…

A bit of Botox while you get your teeth cleaned?

Mais oui! We do it all…Cavities and Chemical Peels- a deal!

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Dr Beri Beri

Don’t think twice…

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Visitors to Florida are usually keen to see an alligator.

There are myraid opportunities to visit Gator farms, Alligator museums and infamous  Gator displays.

Then, there is the unexpected shock of walking near a lake, lagoon, or a pond only to see a “sleeping” gator sunning herself…ready to strike when a pair of white legs walk by.

If ever there was a time to exercise caution – it is near one of those bodies of water which look so appealling for a quick swim.

Who know what lurks beneath those dark and murky waters?  Best Advice? Skip the temptation.

“Don’t taunt the alligator until after you’ve crossed the creek.”

Dan Rather
Qualm

Living in FL: Lizards, geckos, and bugs, oh no!

photo_3231_20070906 We now live in the lush, green, warm tropics.

In the backyard, we have a dozen palm trees and a Star Fruit tree, which on a windy day, drops yellow blobs of fruits at an alarming rate.

Yuck

There are some pointy, succulent, cactusy things in one corner, an orange Hibiscus and thorny, purple, Bougainvillea in the other and there is a smattering of mangy bushes.

 

As a rule, Northern Californians are pretty clueless when it comes to palm trees. Redwood trees are our thing.  Joyce Kilmer certainly wasn’t writing about palm trees.

Who knew that a palm tree would give off these huge, dead pods that look like something out of  “The Invasion of the Body Snatchers?”   Often you wake in the morning and discover, sometime in the quiet of night, another corpse has appeared on your lawn.

Every once in a while you might see a Black Snake. Today, there was a three-foot black snake sunning itself on the steps.

However, the most egregious creatures are the slippery, slimy, ones. They dart and dash and scurry and scamper all over the doorstep and on the patio. Lizards and reptile cousins slither up and down the trees, all over the fence, in and out of bushes.

And, they are on top of your garbage can.  Some of them reside in your garbage can.

I have the unseemly job of taking the garbage can to the driveway and putting it out for the pickup on Monday morning.

My stomach churns, my skin crawls and my mouth is dry, as I open the door to go outside to Lizard Land.  They must know I’m coming.  Can they smell my fear?

Once a week, I put on my perfect-for-Yosemite hiking boots and step into their world.  As fast as I can,  I grab that green receptacle and race to the curb and back into the safety of the house. Door slammed and locked. Good-bye, suckers.

Safe for another week.

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2014/03/01/prompt-chain-gang/

The Evil Twins of Florida: Curb and DB

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Bitter?  Florida is anger – very angry…Trumpcare /Traitors…

Florida is famousfor an Aging demographic. Seniors have time to think, talk, and Vote.10393941_1575977282640664_4067056485906082171_n

 

“The vote by Diaz Balart and Curbelo will be felt here more than in most places around the country. A Kaiser Family Foundation study demonstrates that Miami has the highest concentration of Obamacare users in the nation. More than 365,000 human beings stand to lose health care if the plan Diaz Balart and Curbelo voted for — which still has a long way to go to become law — passes the Senate and is then sent to the president for his signature.

  As stated, “Diaz Balart and Curbelo don’t care about you. They’ll tell you they do. They DON’T! Or else why would they vote to place thousand of their district constituents in harms way?”

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The Good NEWS: Kicked to the Curb, Curbelo

“He should know he wrote his political death certificate with that vote last week. Because we are hell-bent on turning that district blue in 2018,” said Mike Williams, the founder of Indivisible Miami, the local chapter of a new group that sprung up since the election as the left’s answer to the Tea Party.

Bitter

Florida Billboard: boosting Brazilian Butt Lift? Seriously?

 The billboard across from the mall on Biscayne Blvd in Miami read:

 

“Hey! Look at me! Brazilian Butt Lift only $4999″*

 

Stunned – I snapped a photo of the billboard – while driving  …and this is what I shot…IMG_0248

*Imagine, children,  a huge billboard –  

with a “Before” photograph of two old saggy – buns next to another photograph  of  an  

“After” photograph of two 20-year old buns.

You get the picture. Welcome to South Florida…

“My parents didn’t want to move to Florida,

but they turned sixty and that’s the law.”

Jerry Seinfeld

What happens on St Patrick’s day…

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He arrived in a cloud of bravado – replete with kilt, bagpipes and a brusque manner.

His faux brogue, and canned Irish quips were as welcomed as the cacophony from his bona fide, squeaky, bagpipes.

Siobhan thought he was the epitome of charisma. Kelly and Kathleen, the twins, were beguiled by his elan. His legs weren’t bad either.

As the day unfolded, and more Irish Coffees were passed around the room, the dilettante playing barkeep- kept filling trays with shots of Bushmill’s.

The man in the kilt grew more attractive. The camaraderie of the clan- all wearing shades of green and all manner of cliche Irish memorabilia- intensified. Capricious kissing and flagrant flirting were an anomaly – seen rarely – on weeknights and always on March 17th – St Patricks Day. Slainte!

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