Category Archives: Writing exercises Wordpress

Daddy Knows Best? A Joke!

Dr Cranium was in the middle of a complicated brain aneurism/corrective surgery when he needed a break  – he asked his daughter, the hospitial Candy Striper to take over.

General Patton Eishenhower Grant was involved at at National Security Conference pertaining to Russian Intel and – had to take a call about a July 4 Fireworks Committee – he asked his daughter, Mimi, the Girl Scout, to sit in for him at the Classified Event with 16 Generals. 

Captain Elmo Washington, the head of the NYC Fire Department, was at the site of voracious, devastating fire – and needed to get away for a bit. He asked his daughter, Macy’s top Chanel Cosmetics Clerk, to take over in his absence. Carley refused to don any protective gear – she thought it would wrinkle her ensemble and “smoosh” her hair.

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Just three typical examples of what men with responsible jobs do when they need to step away.

Have one of your kids sit in…No Knowledge Required.

 

 

 

via Daily Prompt: Caper

What on Earth were you thinking?

Earth

San Francisco Hero: Joe DiMaggio

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Joltin’ Joe –  The Yankee Clipper –  One of a kind

There will only be one Joe DiMaggio. His talent and tenacity are still talked about.  He is  best known for his 56-game hitting streak (May 15 – July 16, 1941)

An amazing record that still stands.

A boy from Martinez, California, Joe DiMaggio made it big. He came from a large Italian family and his father had dreams for his kids. Little did he know, three of his sons would be successful baseball players – and Joseph would be world famous.

The Golden Gate

When he retired, he ranked fifth in Career Home Runs (361) and sixth in Career Slugging percentage (.579).

He was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1955, and was voted the sport’s Greatest Living Player in a poll taken during the baseball centennial year of 1969.

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An American Icon

From the Joe Di Maggio Official Website
Joe DiMaggio was the quintessential American. More than a man or even a baseball player, he was also an authentic American hero, and cultural icon.

Tenacious

Big Brother is watching and getting paid

US Dollars Money Currency Economy Paper currency paper notes 100 dollars bundle

On Tuesday, the House of Representatives passed a bill

Research

All Your Searches and Websites are no longer private….Look out!

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that would allow Americans’ Internet histories, searches,  private communications, secret and sacred photos,  precious emails

to be bought and sold by

the Top Three Huge Telecom Companies like

Comcast (Xfinity), Verizon and AT&T, without American’s knowledge or consent!

SONY DSCThe U.S. Senate did the same thing a week ago.

Shame! Shame on you!

And, Hallelujah! A Super Hero appears via Twitter: Max Temkin:

Max Temkin @MaxTemkin
If this shit passes I will buy the browser history of every congressman and congressional aide and publish it. cc @SpeakerRyan https://twitter.com/arstechnica/status/846389367262318593

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Puppy Love

Q. How Does Fido show his love for his owner?

A.  Elixer

 

Elixir

Something is rotten in the state…

Department…

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Q. Why have Guns at Schools?  

A. To protect children from Grizzley Bears

 

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Betsy Betsy Besty

 

 

Scent

Guy on Match and his Alternative Facts

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On his online dating profile “Tall, Blond and Fantastic” wrote:

I’m a person that very strongly believes in academics. In fact, every time I say I had an uncle who was a great professor at M.I.T. for 35 years, who did a fantastic job in so many ways, he was an academic genius, and then they say, Look at Him                  (meaning ME) an intellectual!  Trust me, I’m, like, a successful smart person.”

He included a photo of some of his friends…

(Anyone can see the date at the bottom)

He said he has thousands of friends – more than anybody. Ever.

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 Ms HeartFire said there was something too familiar about his blustey, braggadocio comments and she forwarded his Match.com profile. It was rife with classic, all too well known, Alternate Facts.

Hey! Either you are married or single.

All you need is Clues

A few messages later – he divulged he had a Tower in New York City and an estate in Florida. Yeah, yeah Yeah – all of his ex- wives were foreigners – he was fabulous- women loved him – he loved women. He spent a lot of time tweeting messages to Ms XYZ…she was intrigued.

Lots of talk about  limos, jets,  fantastic money, and a new getting a new house – a white house…

READ between the Lines. It only took 10 more tweets from him before she discovered who she was talking to…

Buh bye!

Successful