Tag Archives: Snoring

Pillow Fights and Sleeping Around…the house

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Venus is one hot chick. She love to Tango, yoga is her drug of choice: she is lithe, limber, sexy – and she knows it. She wears sparse, revealing clothing; her long blonde tresses are frequently anchored with a sterling sliver clip – which – when removed, cascades of fat curls appear – and she knows how to nonchalantly, slowly shake her head and garner attantion. She loves high neels and bare legs. Her arms are bedecked with shiny metal bracelets – they flash and make noise when she wants them to.

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Donald shops at the Brooks Brother’s outlet on the East Coast. His wardrobe is handsome, tailored, elegant. Women stop and stare. His neckties are a statement in  color and style.

His last name is Marse. Venus calls him Mars- she thinks it make them sound sexier and more fun. Venus and Mars. He claims he  is all about sexy and more fun- usually. Well, he used to be. Rounds at the hospital are more taxing, his patient load is larger and people are so much sicker. He comes home many nights – after the gym – too tired to do anything but watch the Golden State Warriors. Or the Giants.

He looks forward to climbing into bed and sleeping. She wants to party. She loves going to the clubs and dancing. Mars is the best dancer ever – except when he is tired.

He is always tired.

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At first it was cute – the noise she made -the whispy, tiny snore. Cute. Infrequent. As weeks went on, Venus became a true blue, get the ear plugs, snorer. Mars was getting perturbed, angry and  frustrated and Venus slept away – snoring  loudly. One night, he moved to the guest room and slept like a baby. Her feelings were hurt, she wanted to snuggle, she missed his body next to hers. He missed a good night’s sleep. He tried ear plugs, white noise, Ambien, meditating. The only thing that worked? Separate bedrooms.

They discussed it – argued – disagreed. Mars was mad. Red Hot mad. He wanted eight hours of luxurious, deep, sleep. She agreed. Unbeknownst to him, she enrolled in the Sleep Clinic and got the CPAP machine. Ta Da! In one weeks time, no more pillow fights – Venus and Mars happy again.

It happens.

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